Thoughts on Teresa Tomeo's Extreme Makeover

In the summer of 2014, one of my former colleagues sent a Facebook message to me and some other women, "Just finished reading this book and wanted to recommend it to all. It is worth your time, I will be buying it to use as a reference" with a photo of a library copy of Teresa Tomeo's Extreme Makeover: Women Transformed by Christ Not Conformed to the Culture.

This past year I read the book twice - once on my Kindle and then again in paper version because I wanted to be able to flip back and forth from different sections easier, as well as be able to share it with others.

One of the aspects that I loved most about this book is that I had a better understanding of the rationale for some of the Catholic teaching when it comes to topics that often come up in culture and the media, such as the Catholic Church stance on birth control, abortion, and the role of women in the Church. Though I had an understanding of each before, the book was able to provide a deeper background, which in turn helps to strengthen my convictions and feel a stronger sense of confidence in the teachings when it comes to the well-being of humans. When talking about women's ordination, Tomeo stated, "Although the matter is considered settled, that doesn't mean we should walk away from a deeper understanding of this teaching. If you're still struggling with this issue, reading and prayerfully reflecting on the above documents and Scripture and consulting a good spiritual advisor or director should help you come to peace with the matter" (p. 123). This is a takeaway for me for any Church teaching - make sure that I am well-informed from solid Catholic resources in order to have a sense of peace through understanding.

Another concept that struck me in the book was the recognition that many Catholic adults have not been properly Catechized. As I have been learning more about my Catholic faith, I have been frequently experiencing a sense of surprise that I did not know or did not understand certain concepts or ideas that help click pieces into place to make the bigger picture make a whole lot more sense. Earlier this year I also saw glimpses of Tomeo in the Symbolon series, another key influence on my faith development.

I appreciated that Teresa started the book by sharing her journey. Though our experiences were very different, I learned so much by reading about her growth and reflections and there were implications about goals for my own faith development. I respected her courage, trust, and personal development over time. This reminded me of the power of story and how we can positively impact others if we only have the courage to share our voices and stories.

Extreme Makeover was one of the resources this year that has encouraged me to view evangelization as part of my role and then inspired me to view ways in which I was already evangelizing without thinking about it and then to also start taking steps out of my comfort zone.

Based on Teresa's inner view of the media, it was interesting to learn from her experiences about the perceptions that are and are not valued in popular media, as well as tensions for those who are living in counter-cultural ways with strong convictions aligned to the Christ's teachings. Tomeo quoted Catherine of Siena saying, "When we are whom we are called to be, we will set the world ablaze" (p. 134). I am grateful for resources such as this who help me to reflect on who I am called to be by strengthening my personal faith development and convictions.

Work in Progress: On the Continuum

My spiritual life looks drastically different today than it has at any other point in my life. While my faith life was fairly strong at different points, in recent years it became more of a struggle. The closest I got to feeling like I had a strong beyond Sunday routine in recent years was when I would read my Living Faith daily reflection and then the daily readings from the light of my Kindle while pregnant with Camila. I continued the routine when she was born but then it slipped away when we moved and I started back to work.

When she was about a year old, as part of my One Little Word reflections, I wrote, "Filling out my April monthly card, I knew that the words I wanted to use to capture this point in time was feeling so busy. Then those same words caught my eyes. They were already stated in January and March. I know that February was not much different. I am realizing again and again that sense of feeling like I am drowning from time to time. Though I am getting better with the mental side of busy, today I have been feeling like the word to describe it is coping. Yet, I want to go beyond coping. [...] When life feels like this, it seems that nutrition and exercise often take the back burner as I grasp for air or dog paddle, depending on the moment."

Then about 5 months later, last September,  I wrote, "It feels like there is always one thing that if I can just get past it, I will be able to focus on [goals]. [...] And yet, I want to do so much more than just 'get through'. [...] I feel like there is so much going on, I can't focus too much on anything related to my word other than my general mindset and coping in order to minimize stress."

When Ali Edwards prompted us to write letters to ourselves in October of 2014 as part of her class, I noted, "This year has been a busy one - not unlike recent years. There always seems to be some big change or event that takes up so much time and energy. As you look forward to November and beyond, you hope for a change in the rhythms of your life. [...] You will need courage Amanda, to continue on this path of not allowing the pressure of some to overrule the decisions you have made about your own priorities."

Then that month is when it felt like so much was set into place and the momentum has built.

Realizing that evangelization is a part of my life's purpose is closely linked with a natural pull to impact the lives of others. As I think of ideas and implement different aspects here and there in implicit and explicit ways, the concept of a continuum came to mind. If someone would have told me last year that even though I felt like I was drowning, right now part of my core routines would include: re-engaging daily Bible readings and reflections at the start of the day; a daily rosary; daily Mass; and weekly adoration, I would have felt exasperated and stressed out. I probably would have been defensive, inclined to say I really didn't know how that would be possible.

Yet, here I am. So what changed? What was the catalyst? How did these different pieces click into place as the core to be prioritized, that once in place would help me to feel more at peace and provide guidance for my decisions and priorities in other aspects of my life?

Those questions provide me with a lot to untangle, but what I know for sure is, back then, I just wasn't ready yet. Instead, I was led to have a thirst for something different, something more. In the swirl of gratitude and business and reflection, I was prompted to take steps that would lay the groundwork for where I am now. I was living life experiences that would provide a rationale based on contrast so that I could value these core aspects of my life more.

Knowing what I know about my faith journey in recent years, when trying to positively impact others, I want to keep reminding myself that others are also on their own continuums. If it doesn't seem like my words and actions are prompting shifts that I would like to inspire, I will still persevere knowing that there's always a lot going on under the surface. I will remember that maybe some people just aren't quite ready yet. Maybe the foundation is building.

Today I received a letter that Matthew Kelly sent to Dynamic Catholic Ambassadors, in which he stated, "When I first got started in this ministry in the early 90s, a holy priest took me aside one day and said, 'Never get discouraged. You will only ever see 1% of the impact you have.'" These words spoke to me, reaffirming thoughts that were already swirling in my mind.

Where are you at on your own continuum? How can you honor where others are at on their continuums? How can you learn from others? How can you teach others?